Funny Latest Jokes

Q: What did one hat say to another?
A: You stay here, I'll go on a head!

I failed my driver’s test. The guy asked me "what do you do at a red light?" I said, I don’t know… look around, listen to the radio…

I was coming back from Canada, driving through Customs, and the guy asked,
"Do you have any firearms with you?"
I said: "What do you need?

Q: When will my baby move?
A: With any luck, right after he finishes high school.

Q: When do you stop at green and go at red?
A: When you're eating a watermelon!

Q: Why did the blonde try and steal a police car?
A: She saw "911" on the back and thought it was a Porsche.

Q: What did the traffic light say to the car?
A: Don't look, I'm changing.

Q: Why are blondes like cornflakes?
A: Because they're simple, easy and they taste good.

Q: What do you get when you mix human DNA with goat DNA?
A: Kicked out of the petting zoo.

Q: What's orange and sounds like a parrot?
A: A carrot.