Funny Latest Jokes
An organization is like a tree full of monkeys, all on different limbs at different levels. The monkeys on top look down and see a tree full of smiling faces. The monkeys on the bottom look up and see nothing but assholes.
Q: When is the only time you can smack an ugly woman in the face?
A: When her mustache is on fire.
Q: How was copper wire invented?
A: Two jews fighting over a penny.
I asked a Chinese girl for her number. She said, "Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!" I said, "Wow!" Then her friend said, "She means 666-3629."
A wife asked her husband, "What do you like most in me, my pretty face or my sexy body?" He looked at her from head to toe and replied, "I like your sense of humor!"
Q: What did the baby corn say to the mama corn?
A: "Where’s Popcorn?"
What do you get when you put a candle in a suit of armor? A knight light.
Why did the storm trooper buy an iphone? He couldn’t find the Droid he was looking for.
A guy shows up late for work.
The boss yells: "You should have been here at 8:30!"
he replies: "Why? What happened at 8:30?"
After 12 years of therapy my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes..
He said, "No hablo ingles."