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Funny Woman jokes

A girl goes to a library.
Girl: I want the book, "Women- The most perfect and intelligent."
.
.
Librarian: Comic section is at the backside.

10
2016-09-14 09:54:51

Men are like fine wine: They all start out as grapes, and it is your job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something you'd want to have with dinner.

5
2016-09-14 09:54:51

Wife: Why do you go out in the balcony, when I start singing.
Husband: Because the people would think I am beating you.

10
2016-09-14 09:54:51

Lisa needs brain surgery and figures its easier to buy a new brain. She asks the doctor what he has on sale.
"Well you're in luck I have two in stock, a man's brain for $1000, and a woman's for $100."
Surprised she asks why the price difference?
"Generally women brains run cheaper because they come to us used!"

5
2016-09-14 09:54:51

Q: Why do women wear make up and perfume?
A: Because, they are ugly and they stink...

8.5
2016-09-14 09:54:51

Q: How can you tell when a woman is about to say something smart?
A: When she starts a sentence with "a man once told me".

7
2016-09-14 09:54:51

Q: Why do women have smaller feet then men?
A: So that they can stand closer to the kitchen sink!

9.25
2016-09-14 09:54:51

Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do?
Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes.

7.63
2016-09-14 09:54:51

Ever wonder why ABCDEF are used to define bra sizes?
A – Almost
B – Better
C – Cute
D – Damn good
E – Enormous
F – Fake
PS. . . they should add a new size for the over 50 group.
G – Gone South!

7.43
2016-09-14 09:54:51

Husband: everytime I hit you, you never fight back. how do you manage your anger?
Wife: I clean the toilet seat.............
Husband: how does it help
Wife: I use your toothbrush!!!!

5
2016-09-14 09:54:51