Funny Woman jokes
I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with "Guess" on it...so I said "Implants?"
Q: What is the difference between women and magnets ?
A: Magnets have also positive side.
Could you imagine if God turns out to be a woman? Not only am I going to hell, but I will never know why.
I asked a sexy Chinese girl for her number.
She replied, Sex Sex Sex,Free Sex tonight.
I said, Wow!
Then her friend said, She means 6663629.
Q: What is the diffrent between a girl and a cellphone...
A: You can put a cellphone on silent.
Catherine, pregnant with her first child, paid a visit to her obstetrician's office. After the exam, she shyly began,
"My husband wants me to ask you..."
"I know, I know," the doctor said, placing a reassuring hand on her shoulder. "I get asked that all the time. Sex is fine until late in the pregnancy."
"No, that's not it," Catherine confessed. "He wants to know if I can still mow the lawn."
Why are women like parking spaces?
Because all the best ones are taken....and the rest are handicapped.
Paddy's been arrested again for punching his wife!. The judge asks,
"Why do you keep beating her?"
Paddy say's, "I think it's my weight advantage, longer arm reach and superior footwork!"
Q: What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?
A: You can unscrew a light bulb.
A woman wants everything from one man.
A man wants one thing from all the women.